The Tree of Life

Sunday evening, sitting in front of my laptop, while doing my routine stumbling on web, came across a movie titled The Tree of Life. Being in software field first thing that comes to mind after reading tree is ‘binary tree’, so for me it became ‘the binary tree of life’.

At first it was an honest mistake but then I could not stop my ‘philosophical’ self from digging deeper and exploring this idea. What if our life is just a binary tree?

For all of us life starts same way, right? That means there is a root node common to all. Everybody starts from there.

For all of us life ends, right? That means we all have a leaf node. Some people live up to hundred of years and some don’t even get to live a minute, so it means not all leaf nodes are at same level.

To put it simply life is just starting from root node and going up to your leaf node. Life is just about finding your path, at every node choosing whether to go left or to go right.

However we never get to choose if we will be a boy or girl, will be born in US or Sudan, will be Muslim or Jewish. So in a way we don’t get to chose our path in start, its like a random number generator that decides which path we would take.

Later we get to make our choices, we get to choose where we want to go. At every moment we make a choice which makes us go left or right and if we get a little lazy in making choice, if we wait for GOD to show us a way that random number generator will choose something for us. As we all know no random number generator is perfect so what we get is never guaranteed to be fair. This explains why life is not fair if you let GOD decide your destiny.

Even if you make most of the choices yourself, you are never sure you are going where you want to go. When we are making decision all we see is next two nodes. Some of us will just choose one based on what looks good at moment, people who live in the moment.

Others who know what node they want to reach in future might have there own algorithm to decide which path to take, but again no algorithm will guarantee that they will reach the node they want to reach.

I know I can just keep writing about this ‘tree of life’ but I am choosing the node which says to stop now because at this moment it looks like a good idea. Whether to continue it and explore more will be decided at next node.

A Forgotten Dream

One fine Sunday morning (or should I say afternoon) you wake up from a good dream. A dream you were really enjoying. First thing that comes to mind is why do I have to wake up when I am having such a beautiful dream. Next moment you try to sleep again and continue same dream. And here comes the surprise, now you don’t even remember what you were dreaming about.

You know you were enjoying the dream but you don’t know what you were dreaming about. You have some images in your mind which are not enough to remind you of your dream. A dream which makes you feel good but you don’t know for sure what that dream is. A dream which you want to remember but you are simply not able to.

Does it all make any sense, No? then lets make it more simple(or should I say complicated). Lets try going back a few years, and think as a child. As a child we all have some dreams like when I will be A years old I will do this, when I will be B I will do that. We really enjoy those dreams and then with time as we grow up, our mind awakens. Now you remember you enjoyed those small dreams but can you remember what you dreamed about? I can’t.Maybe even you cannot.

In your mind somewhere there is your dream which you don’t seem to find. A dream you want to remember but you cannot. A dream which is more than just A Forgotten Dream.

No idea why

A feeling that will never go away from your heart.
A heart that always conflicts with what you have in your mind.
A mind that can be so obsessed with a single idea.
An idea that can define or destroy all your goals.
Goals that might keep eluding you for your whole life.
A life that might just be a dream you had.
A dream that makes you question yourself.
A question that might not have an answer.
An answer that you know but wish you did not knew.
A wish that might never come true.
A truth that can hurt your feelings.
which will create another feeling that will never go away from your heart.
It all comes back, no idea why?

A new start

Suppose you are proud of your photography skills although you might not be a very good photographer. On a scale of zero to ten you might be zero but you just enjoy spending time looking around and capturing beautiful moments. Every time you see a beautiful scene, wow!! comes out of your mouth even before you can think of what to speak. And then while traveling on train you meet a person who just does not care about photography. For him its just pressing a button, click!! and done.

While you are busy capturing photo of a cute puppy, he thinks “How stupid!! We have so many similar puppies running around in our locality. Nobody cares about them and here this gentleman is busy taking a photo of it. Huh!! Pretending to be a photographer.” Later when you show him the picture you have just taken, he responds “What is special in this?? Anybody can buy a camera and take a photo.” Can you tell me how would it feel?? Not very pleasant for sure.

You might be wondering why exactly I am telling this. Lets replace the photography by reading/reciting, beautiful scenes/moments by beautiful quotes/poetry and there I am. I just love reading quotes and poetry. Every time I realize that a quote/poetry has deeper meaning than what it looks like, it gives me a WOW moment.

Recently I met someone who is the ‘person’ in above mentioned story. I was sharing some of my favorite quotes with him and telling him how beautiful and insightful they are. When I asked him what does he think about it, his response was “Anybody can read and then recite, what did you add to it?” That was the moment when I felt like really stupid, and I did not know what to say.

Once in a while we all meet some person who just does not appreciate what we are proud of. Who does not see the things like we see them. That person might be a friend(Yes, most of the time), relative, coworker or some stranger sitting in front of you in train. So what do we do? Just ignore that person assuming he is not the right person to appreciate what we appreciate, or just start again and add something of you in what you like.

This is what I am doing this time. Starting again